Phone Hex

Reading this great post at one of my favorite blogs -- Hair Raising Hell -- reminded me of one of my own pet peeves.  Let me elaborate:

Ring Ring

"Good Afternoon, this is Mary A."

"Hi Mary!  How are you?"

"Doing well, thanks!  How are you?"

"I'm Good."

"Great.  How can I help you?"

"Do you  know who this is?"

Sigh. 
The "guess who I am" game.  At work. 

Do you think this is charming?  It's not.

If you're calling me at home and ask "Do you know who this is?", I will generally hang up.  Because I once got an obscene phone call that started with "Do you know who this is?".  So that question kinda freaks me out anyway.

But if you're calling me at work I will give you the benefit of the doubt.

I don't know who you are, OK?

I have no fucking clue.

I know you aren't my mother.  My mother has been smoking for 63 years.  Her voice is rather distinct.  Plus, she's too much of a lady to jerk me around like that.  And she ALWAYS identifies herself.  I know it's you, Mom, but I appreciate you having enough courtesy to identify yourself anyway.

When I call her, I always identify myself.  She has 2 daughters.  We probably sound similar on the phone. 

When you call me -- at home, at work, or on the cell -- please identify yourself.  Please.

Also, as long as we're on the subject:  if your name is Mary, Mark, Mike, Dave, Joe, Kathy, Lori, Tom, Rick, Jose, Manuel, Cynthia, or Debbie, and if we don't speak on the phone very often, do me a favor and gimme your last name too.  I have lots of Marys, Marks, Mikes, Daves, Joes, Kathys, Loris, Toms, Ricks, Joses, Manuels, Cynthias and Debbies who might call me at work for whatever reason.  I love talking to each of them.  Truly.  But I prefer knowing which one I'm chatting with.

And one more thing:  sign your texts.  I don't know your number by sight (except for Vic & Gabe). I have a cheap phone.  Just gimme some quick initials, 'kay?

Thanks.

Love,

Mary A