Sunday, January 20, 2013

Mom's Advice Applies to Social Media


"For Heaven's Sake close your mouth when you chew!"  says every mother everywhere.

"Why?" says every mouthy little brat.

"Because", replies mother patiently, "NO ONE WANTS TO SEE YOUR FOOD".

Folks, mom is right.

No one wants to see your food.

NO ONE.

Not even Facebook.

It's one thing to post a photo of a beautifully designed wedding cake, it's quite another to post that pic of sweet-potato-lentil stew you made.  I know it's delicious.  But it looks like vomit.

As a rule, food is not photogenic.

I know it looks pretty on Pinterest.  So did the white manicure with purple dots.  In real life?  It looks like I've been playing with white-out and a sharpie. 

I am happy to hear about your yummy food, I just don't care to see it.  Especially things like biscuits & gravy, corned beef hash, bean & cheese chalupas, eggs sunny side up (gag), venison chili, tapioca pudding and peanut butter & jelly sandwiches. 

The exception, of course, is a dipped Italian Beef from Portillos. 

This?  Is friggin GORGEOUS


8 comments:

  1. I didn't know you guys had Portillo's down in Texas!! Lucky you. I LOVE me some Portillo's. :)

    All the best eats come from Chicago, but you already knew that. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We DON'T have Portillos down here -- which is why I had to commemorate my sammich with a photo. Dang that was an awesome beef.

      Delete
  2. What about cocktails? Are cocktails photogenic??

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. as a rule, I think cocktails are pretty. except white russians. ew.

      Delete
  3. Hahahahah!!!! So eloquently put, though I know I'm guilty of a few foodie posts over on Instagram (99% of the time they're of delightfully decorated baked goods and boozy concoctions). But you're right, there are some meals that should be better left enjoyed by the belly and not the eyes. THere's a guy on my feed to likes to post photos of RAW meat... UGH.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ugh indeed!

      My sister in law is an unapologetic food poster. To be fair, her food is usually well staged. She has a pass. (Plus, I can't afford her to leave the family)

      Another Facebook friend (who is very into fit food, which I admire) posted a pic of LEFTOVERS.

      Sigh. Love you, H. Your uneaten shepherd's pie? Not so much.

      Delete
  4. As a girl who devoted an entire blog post to a crab cake, I am going to stay out of this discussion.


    But in my defense, it was a DAMN good crabcake.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But you are a PROFESSIONAL. Amateurs need to stay away from the instagram!

      Delete

I LOVE to read comments. Seriously. I check them every day. Insecure? Maybe.