Remember This?

"By 2/1/12, I will be down to at least 229 by working out 5 or more times a week and eating at least 7 servings of fruits and vegetables a day."

Posted on 11/19/11.

Ahem.  Yeah.  About that. . ..

I didn't quite make the progress I hoped.

In November, I squeaked by losing one more lb to a new low of 243.  Yahfuckinghoo.

I got on the scale today, and. . . .

I gained 2 lbs. 

I should say I gained AT LEAST 2 lbs, because I stepped on the scale after Vic's 2012 Inaugural Bootcamp which made me sweat the equivalent of an Olympic swimming pool.

I'm not surprised. 

I feel like I have rug burn on my ass from December's backslide. 

I finished the year at a party, where I enjoyed smokies wrapped in biscuit dough, creamy potatoes spiked with bacon and cheese, caramel popcorn, a few more smokies, a bite of salad and a cupcake. 

The night before, we went to Cracker Barrel for dinner. .  .pancakes, eggs, pancakes and a bite of chicken fried steak.

It's not that gaining 2 lbs over Christmas and new years is a big deal.  It's not.

It's just that I have spent the last year and a half doing good things for my health, and then rushing to the computer so I can brag about it like a 2 year old who made her first poo-poo in the potty.

I swear I tried to think of a better analogy.

Anyway, you guys are all VERY supportive of me, so I feel I need to be accountable to you.

New Year, new start.

I will not be derailed by 2 stupid lbs.

Remember that I said that.  'Kay?

Need a New Bucket

I have 3 more 5Ks to run before I finish my goal of 1 5K every month for the year.

Yeay.

I like 5Ks.  They are fun.  They are hard for me.  I feel like I've accomplished something when I finish one.

I don't LOVE 5Ks. 

I haven't gotten much faster since I started.  Hell -- I haven't gotten any faster. 

In 2012, I am not going to run a 5K every month.

I AM going to run Beach to Bay, because B2B is the ultimate.  I will run anything that my guys at V-Fit put on.

But 1 a month?  Nah.

Which begs the question:  what is my fitness goal next year?

Don't tell me to do a 10K, 1/2 Marathon or Marathon.  No thanks.

I do need to accomplish something though.

Something hard for me. 

Something that I have to work on all year long.

Something I can blog about.

Ideas??????

Did You Know. . .

That today is http://www.giftoffat.com's/ birthday! 

To celebrate, I will eat a cupcake and let someone take a photo of me smashing it in my face. 

I originally concieved of The Gift of Fat as a book.   A New York Times Bestselling book.

My book will explore a fat girl's life.  (yeah -- that's never been done before. *snort*).

I have been fat all of my life.  A lot of people think that they are fat. In many cases, it's more of a self-perception than a concrete reality. Not that the fat feelings are any less significant, it's just that . . .well, it's different. In my case, everyone else knew I was fat too. How. . . .validating.

My book will be original because I will explain how I came to realize -- in my 30's -- that while being fat really really sucks, there are gifts associated with being fat.  No one ever talks about the gifts.

Gifts like devloping a quick sense of humor.  Developing a strong sense of justice.  A powerful work ethic and a thirst to prove that I can do anything a thin person can do.  Gifts like realizing that I stand out -- and if I wasn't fat, I would look just like everybody else.  Friendships.  Experiences.  Revelations.  Advocacy. The book will cover all of those things.

I started the blog to begin chapters of my book.  I thought I could just tie up all the blog posts in a shiny package and sell it to Penguin Books, who would publish it with great fanfare and retail it at $29.99 hardcover, $9.99 on Kindle. 

Turns out, the blog is not the book. 

Not that there won't be a book.  There will be.  I think.  The blog serves different, but important purposes.

I am a sucker for being the center of attention, and I love to make people laugh.  Much of this blog has been trying to make you laugh, which guarantees me a spot in the center of attention for a few minutes.

The blog is also about my journey.  My journey into fitness. . .and my newfound passion for working out.  I never expected to love excercise.  In fact, did I just write that I love excercise?  WTF?

I don't consider myself a "mommy-blogger", but I am a mom. . . so I write about it.

I never expected the blog to be relational.  Who knew you could make friends with people you've never met?  Turns out -- I have made cyber friends.  Nikki, Lex, Andi, Annabelle, plus my wonderful commenters (Hi Diane!).

Mostly, the blog helps me find my "voice".  Writing the blog has been a great experience.  I plan to continue.

For at least another year.

New Year's Revolutions

I am not a resolution maker.

I am a goal setter. 

Goals must by SMART - Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Timed.  I thought of that acronym all by myself.  Just kidding -- I think it's Zig Ziglar's.  One should set goals in many aspects of their life:  Financial, Physical, Spiritual, Social, Educational, and I can't think of the other ones.  Goals must also be written, and shared. 

So here are the 2011 Goals:

Educational:

I will take one class each session. 

Social:

I don't have any social goals this year. 

Spiritual:

I will read at least one book about my faith every quarter. 

Physical:

I will work out at least 4 times each week.
I will include fruit and/or vegetables at each meal.

Financial:

We will pay off the goddamn Sallie Mae by 12/31/2012.

There are other plans I have for the year, even if I am not setting a specific goal.  One is to make more time for my girlfriends.  I have friends that I only see when our kids have birthday parties.  Not a good way to maintain a friendship.  I plan to clear out the linen closet, and I want to do some scrap-booking.  I am going to blog as long as I have something to say.  I am going to go on dates with Greg more often.  Spend more one on one time with each of my boyos.  Get the Christmas shopping done early. 

Here's what I am not going to do:

Go on a diet.


What are you going to do?

Happy Birthday to Me. . . .

Today I am 45.

When I was 25, I had a plan for where I would be now.  Fortunately, I am pretty much where I thought I would be in life.  I have a husband, kids, a house, a job.  At 45 my kids are probably younger than I expected, my house isn't as grand as I thought it would be, and I had NO idea I would be working here.  Hell, at 25 I had no idea I would ever live in Texas again.  (My family lived in Dallas for a year when I was 8.  My mother hated it.)

At 25 I had no idea that I wouldn't care that I am not driving a Beemer anymore.  In fact, my 45 year old self is kinda making fun of my 25 year old self for caring about the Beemer in the first place.

At 25 I had no idea that I wouldn't return to graduate school until I was 43.  I thought I'd be finished with my JD or MBA or whatever by 35.  Except that I didn't set a goal to go back to school, so that never happened.

I did set a goal to be happily married.  Guess what?  I'm happily married.  Very happily married.  In fact, Greg was cracking me up this weekend -- after all these years his sense of humor is still so refreshing.

I did set a goal to be involved with my church.  Guess what?  My church is part of my family.  Christ is such a central point of our lives -- way more than I envisioned at 25. 

I did set a goal to own a BMW.  I owned one.  Big whoop.  Not as rewarding as the husband or the church.

I set a goal to be financially independent.  Guess what?  We are almost there.  We pay cash for everything and we have only Greg's goddamn student loan and the house to pay off.  God willing, within 5-7 years, we will have NO DEBT.  Honestly, my 25 year old self pictured financial independence differently.  I envisioned a lot more stuff.  Fortunately, the reality of financial independence is less stuff, more security.  More peace.  Dave Ramsey knows what he's talking about. 

I set a goal to have 2 kids.  A boy and a girl.  I surpassed my goal.  Three boys means that some day I will have a daughter-in-law or two.  Or three.  Again, at 25, I had no idea how much I would like these people that look so much like my husband.  I knew I would love them.  Admittedly, I had no idea of the intensity.  But I really like them.  Most of the time. 

I set a goal to be a size 8.  HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHA.  What  stupid goal.  Who cares what size I am?  Not me. 

No, I am FAR from that goal.  But I am healthy.  And strong.  (Dude -- Gabe worked  my shoulders so hard last night that I can barely lift my arms to type.  Ow.)  I can do things I never thought I would do.  Like a real push up.  Or "run" a 5 K.  Again, my reality is better than my vision.

The key is setting goals.  Goals that matter.  The experts say you must have SMART goals.  (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic & Timed).

At 45, I am setting more goals. 

I wonder what they will look like when I'm 65?

I'll let you know!