Monday, September 26, 2011

Subtracting Ads

Blogger has this feature called Ad Sense where bloggers can agree to have ads posted on their blogs. That way, blog readers can learn about great products and features and bloggers can earn millions of dollars. And since there is nothing wrong with my life that a million bucks can't fix, I signed up. 

I'm still about $999,998.21 shy of a million bucks.

After having Ad Sense on my blog for about 6 months, I only accrued about a buck and some change in ad revenue.


It could be because I don't have enough readers.

Or it could be that all  my readers are too cheap smart to buy things from blog ads.

It's probably because Ad Sense notes key words on your blog and posts ads that seem to be related to your topics.  Consequently, the only ads I seemed to attract were ads for Weight Watchers (who I hate) and Jillian Michaels (who I also hate).  Telling my readers how much I hate these products is not the most effective way to earn ad revenue.

Know who I love?  V-Fit

If you want to spend money to get fit, don't spend it at Weight-Fucking-Watchers or Jillian-Horseface-Michaels.  Spend it at V-Fit.  Skype workouts are available.  And really, really, hard.  And really, really effective. 

I won't earn any ad revenue, but at least I know that all of my 81 wonderful readers will have access to the best. 


  1. haha! I've had AdSense on my blog for years, and I don't think I've even hit $5 yet. That's so funny.

  2. AdSense is bogus. They're the only ones who truly make any money! Those bastards!!

  3. I agree! AdSense is one of the times Google totally breaks its "Don't Be Evil" rule. STOP THE ADSENSE MADNESS, GOOGLE.

  4. Hey, that's not too far from a million. Start planning that vacation now.

  5. Is that how adsense works? People actually have to buy things? I wondered what it was all about. I never really looked because I pretty much decided in advance that I would never do it, but I was kinda curious...

  6. Hahaha! I love the ironic ads you attract! You're staging your own covert ad rebellion! Fight the Man! I'm in!


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